With that lovable, pesky Cameron out of the picture (at the zoo?), Zachary steers the podcast eastward to his true homeland of Japan. That country’s unique brand of RPGs pop up in the form of Final Fantasy VIII and Ni No Kuni, which doesn’t do much to turn Stephen and Bryan from their skeptical ways. They’re much happier at talk about Birthday Games, Birthday Games, Stephen Got Them for His Birthday– it’s kind of a new segment. Why, there’s maddeningly hilarious Nightshade, controversial hot button voter issue 1080 Avalanche, uncomfortable dream machine Chulip, and more besides! But really, when it comes down to it, Disembodied Voices is about love, and so is a large chunk of this podcast during which the trio talks about romance in video games and how it’s almost always dumb. And, to honor the absent Cameron, this description will end with an obligatory “Your FACE is dumb.”
Stephen has been busy with his coming-of-24–years-of-age ritual over the past week, which includes playing one video game from every console he owns. Vanquish and Jumping Flash 2 steal the show with cutting edge technology, but Fragile Dreams breaks Zachary’s fragile heart because Stephen and Bryan are angry at it. Such is the way of life, and Cameron has been learning life lessons aplenty by reconnecting with Pajama Sam, so he no longer has a need to hide when it’s dark outside. Unfortunately, these good, honest morals didn’t rub off on the DV Cast at large and the entire podcast begins to crumble when Zachary steps out to watch the live Hyrule Warriors Nintendo Direct and Stephen does the same after Bryan refuses to watch The LEGO Movie with him, which sends Cameron into a blind rage and Bryan into a desperate hosting mode. Nobody died, but it was close.
This episode begins with lots of yelling, so that’s… good. But who wouldn’t raise his or her voice in celebration when Stephen’s birthday just happened, complete with fifteen new old video games hand chosen by Bryan and just waiting to be played? Cameron helped out by sending Stephen a copy of Ollie Ollie and singing loudly, distracting himself from the murky fate of Destiny with merrymaking and the like. He also joins forces with Zachary in a militant anti-MOBA stance, which leads a bit more yelling. There’s also video games and stuff– just listen to the episode already!
The DV Cast talk about their dreams this week. Not their hopes or ambitions, mind you, but those weird hallucinations they all get when unconscious for the night. These visions involve cowboys, fractured bones, and GameCubes that hold souls of the dead within. Speaking of unsettling glances into the minds of the podcasters, Bryan and Zachary have been playing an online game of Civilization V with new friend Parker. He won’t be a new friend for long, unfortunately, as Bryan is a warmongering madman who bathes in blood and brushes his teeth with tears of the innocent. Stephen would be crushed beneath his world-spanning heel as well were it not for World of Warcraft sucking him under the tides of darkness and into the fishy seascapes of Vashj’ir wherein he rides seahorses all day and all night. (This might also be a dream…?) After an update on the Whales are Whales Minecraft server, Bryan rudely yells over Stephen’s exciting news and storms out, leaving his brother and Zachary to finish up by themselves. A silly conversation about Sonic Jump Fever evolves into a solemn perspective on today’s youth, so there’s that.
From the parting mists steps a man, sallow eyes lit by the neon glow of a hundred distant city lights like a bowl of souls catching fire. He’s been to Hell and back, this man, and pain trails him in the night.
“Transistor,” the man they call Cameron whispers through the dark, “isn’t as good as Bastion.”
Well, Stephen “Never Shuts Up” Kelly has a more optimistic appraisal of the situation, and he gingerly attempts to step around the spoilers for Bryan’s sake. To further disillusion Cameron, Dark Souls 2 has bested him and nobody wants to play Titanfall; they’d rather talk in-depth about TV’s Arrow and its distinctly non-Marvel take on superheroes. This bores Cameron, as does brand new segment Stephen’s Haphazard Video Game Reviews… Yeah, which invites listeners and a rinky-dink tale of Sonic Advanced and a little bit of pinball. After all of these difficult times, it’s a wonder that Cameron wants to extend the podcast past its usual hour mark to discuss the nature of action adventure games and whether or not that genre actually makes any sense.
Welcome to the first episode of Here’s the Scoob, a podcast dedicated to keeping you in the groove with everyone’s, like, favorite mystery-solving gang. The new Scooby-Doo cartoon gets points for complex character growth and demerits for use of cell phones, but the high jinks eventually (and inevitably) drift into JRPG territory thanks to Tales of Symphonia and Tales of Everything Else. Without Cameron there to implement draconian anti-WoW policies, western RPGs get some room to breath as well– oh, and Kirby eats multiple trains in Kirby Triple Deluxe, did you know that? It’s very cool.
May the fourth be with you, and may it also be with Zachary ’cause it’s his birthday! (At the time of this recording, at least. Come on, these guys don’t have time travelling powers like Putt-Putt. Not everyone can be like Putt-Putt you judgmental ruffian.) The episode starts out with a bunch of yelling and weird music, but before you know it Zachary is jumping out of his own metaphorical birthday cake to make a surprise appearance. He and Cameron go on and on about Dark Souls II again, so you’d better be down for talks of death and stat-based intrigue. There’s still room for Guess That Pokemon: Wookieepedia Edition, a quiz that pits two beloved science fiction universes together in a clash that reveals Admiral Ackbar’s first name. Cameron hates this game. :)